The Dangers of Toxic Positivity

The idea that we must remain optimistic at all times can actually be detrimental to our well being.

Let's take five minutes to see this week in a new light. By Wendy Rose Gould & Amy Morin, LCSW, Editor-in-Chief Top of Mind The Dangers of Toxic Positivity   While practicing gratitude and highlighting positives are important, the idea that we must remain optimistic at all times can be detrimental to our well being.   This "good vibes only" approach—referred to as "toxic positivity"—glosses over real hardships and feelings that we and others experience. This creates the problem of stuffing down emotions, curbs genuine connection, and can make others feel unheard.   We all deal with painful emotions and experiences. Those emotions, while often unpleasant, are important and need to be felt and dealt with openly and honestly." — KENDRA CHERRY, MS    Why Toxic Positivity is Harmful Avoids Human Connection: Pivoting to a phrase like "remain positive," after someone has expressed sadness or hardship is an easy way to avoid authentic connection. Prevents Growth: Truly feeling and working through uncomfortable emotions allows us to grow. Creates Feelings of Guilt and Shame: Side-stepping our and others' emotions says, "These feelings you're having aren't worth discussing." Examples of Toxic Positivity When we engage in toxic positivity with ourselves, it might look like brushing off problems instead of facing them, feeling guilty about the feelings we're experiencing, or hiding our true feelings from others.   When exhibiting toxic positivity toward another person, that might look like minimizing the other person's feelings or shaming people for not remaining positive instead of showing support.   It's OK to feel uncomfortable emotions and to simply say, "I hear you" instead of trying to find an easy answer or fix in the moment.      On the Bright Side Ways to Stay Positive This Week Ways to Nurture Your Mind and Body  This week, take some time to sit with any uncomfortable emotions you might feel. What is your initial reaction when these feelings come on? Is it to think about something else, grab your phone, or walk away from the conversation? Linger on these emotions and pinpoint why you might be feeling this way. By learning to recognize toxic positivity, you'll be able to live in a more authentic way and grow as a person. The Well Beings campaign addresses the critical health needs of Americans through original content available online and in-person. This collaborative, multi-year campaign tackles real issues and brings awareness to important—often side-stepped—topics. The Good Talk Conversation Cards (Friends Edition), are designed to ignite meaningful conversations and foster deeper connection in a lighthearted way. They're great for all sorts of occasions, including game nights, road trips, dinners, and casual get togethers.   This Week on The Verywell Mind Podcast   On tomorrow's episode of The Verywell Mind Podcast, I talk to psychologist Brian Pilecki about the potential for psychedelic substances to support therapeutic treatment for mental health issues.   Based in Oregon, Brian talks about battling the stigma of psychedelic use, opening minds to alternative treatments, and the cutting-edge research that could help heal emotional pain.     Follow Now: Apple Podcasts / Spotify / Google Podcasts / RSS Read These Next What Is Spiritual Bypassing? READ NOW How to Overcome Your Fear of Vulnerability READ NOW 40 Coping Skills for Dealing With Uncomfortable Emotions READ NOW Spread the Light Share the newsletter with someone you know to make their day a little brighter. SHARE We're open to suggestions! If you have any feedback about this newsletter, let us know at feedback@verywell.com.     You are receiving this newsletter because you subscribed to the Healthy Mind newsletter. If you wish to unsubscribe, please click here. If someone forwarded you this email, you can subscribe here!   A DOTDASH BRAND 28 Liberty Street, 7th Floor, New York, NY, 10005   © 2021 Verywellmind.com - All rights reserved. Privacy Policy